Comments on baby from in-laws

I’m not on the best term with my in laws! When my baby was almost a month old they insisted on bringing the baby to their house so that they can pray (for idk what fk reason) I’m a Christian they Buddhist so I’m super annoyed already! When I went over baby needed to latch so I went to the room to latch then after that baby poop so I change diaper and then latch again! All these took awhile! So MIL decided to be a bij came in the room and say “why so long one baby NEED to go down” I shoot back “why NEED to go down? I’m latching you all WAIT” lmao beggars can’t be choosers. After that they also keep saying about my baby girl and teaching me what to do! “Need to shave the hair” “need to shave the brow” “need to drink water” need to do this do that ALL I retaliate cause I’m not the kind that will keep quiet and tahan so I say “why need to cut I’m not going to cut” “already no brows shave what brows crazy ah” “not even 6 months drink what water” I just shut them up with “THIS IS MY BABY YOU ALL DONT TEACH ME WHAT TO DO IF YOU ALL WANT A BABY TO CONTROL GO MAKE 1 yourself” So in my opinion dont shut up just speak for yourself when you need to. JIA YOU!

i feel u. my baby fell sick a few days after her first day in infant care. my mil came over, and said, "babies who are not fully breast fed usually get suck easily. maybe the teachers didn't take care of her properly. " then she went on and compared with my nephew,( my sis in law is a SAHM) "he's fully breastfed, taken care of at home. not even once he got sick. didnt even have fever after his immunizations." i felt enraged. i was so angry at how she mindlessly compared me,a working mom, to a SAHM. so i bluntly said,"ya your daughter is able to breastfeed everytime becos she's not working and doesn't have a house yet and still living under your roof. she has u at her beck and call to help her if she needs rest. " i swear to you, my mil shut up and stopped all these unnecessary comments after that. sorry for being long winded but im tryna tell you to just be Blunt! the parents and in laws need this reminder sometimes

totally with you... stay strong! i would propose 1) bring it up to your husband; seek his concurrent and ask him to stop the comments 2) dont lose your cool which i think is impt for a long term rlship. take the baby, walk away to the kitchen, to the room. hopefully they can sense your avoidance and dislike in such topic/comment 3) i would be frank and tell them that i have no control on how my baby looks. Part of the baby comes from the dad and the family. 4) answer them in a way to say that u love the baby the same, no less, regardless of how they may have judge. ppl usually stop after hearing defensive remark. 5) i tried to be amicable.. but when worst case, just had to tell them directly, stop commenting on the baby and you need them to set a better example as grandparents

Sounds like my mil. Omg. My hubby talk to her also no use. Her mouth just cannot stop, need to say if not she will be unhappy and heart attack with all this prolonged unhappiness . Lol In the end I moved further and further away from her... until now we are in 2 different countries . And best still with Covid , I no need to visit her anymore. So no need to hear her nonsense and be controlled by her. But we still call and video conference very often. And I try to say mostly good things about mil in front of hubby. Move far far away. If she stay in west, u move to east, if she stay in east u move to west ...

been there gone through that phase during confinement period the whole 44days and ongoing. At first I put a deaf ear and told my husband single thing as I don't want to be having a depression. Till something triggers me I just told them off and told them if they have nothing nice to say just shut up. if they keep on continue this stupid comments I would not come to their house. it works for me I know I'm being rude but my husband supports me as he could not take it either.

Congratulations on your new baby!! Alright, it seems that you still want an amicable relationship with your in-laws so the best way to handle is going through from your husband. Let him know that it hurts and hint to them not to say such things. If this long process doesn't work, then the next time you meet, you can tell them that you love your baby no matter what and hope they do too 🥰

dont let those comments affect u. you are stronger than that. now you re a mommy🥰. if i were in your shoes, i will just take the baby tell my hub if they dont like it they can dont see the bb and tell him you re unhappy with the feedback and hope he and his parents can be more sensitive towards a new mommy going to through post partum. be firm okay? congrats

I would say: 1. Your comment really hurts my feelings 2. Well, that’s not v positive to say 3. I love my baby no matter what skin tone or how he/she looks like… 4. Show ur displeased face and say this (ur comments) really isnt helping me. Hang in there mummy. Ur feelings are valid.

to me ignore is the best way or u may say ▪︎THANK YOU for your comment ▪︎ your comment is well noted ▪︎ it's too early to comment, baby is growing everyday to avoid unhappiness, I won't be visiting them at all, it's fine if hubby want to pay them visit with daughter

express that you didn't like their comments through non verbal cues. better not to say verbally as it registers in mind and stays for ever. but in reality, I also retort back sometimes. it's not possible at the recieving end at all times.