Feel like a failure

It is great that you are taking care of yourself by ranting. We all need support one way or another. Indeed, when we grow up the idea, consciously or subconsciously, that mothers naturally know what to do with their babies and when it looks like everyone got it and not us, it is especially disheartening and we worry if we are good enough to care for baby or good enough as a mom. But we forget that mom and baby are essentially still adapting to the new life out of the womb . Like how when we were pregnant, we had to learn the different routines baby has, like when they are most active and the different patterns each trimester or even week brings. There might be more reasons to why baby fuss when back to you, overtired could be one. My overtired baby is Ms Cranky. Doesn’t feed well, takes a long time to sleep and doesn’t sleep well. Nights are always more difficult due to the accumulation of stress of growing on baby. We also feel more vulnerable at night as we too accumulate the stress of taking care of baby and life. As what other commenter mentioned, baby like to “bully” their closest. See it that baby does it because baby feels the most safe with us and thus able to let out the full force of their feelings without worry. 3months pp, we are still healing from pregnancy and labour. Furthermore, with addition of taking care of baby. It will take time for our strength to get back. Some are also built differently to have more strength. Baby is not gonna forget you, the bond can be deepen everyday with each interaction. You got this mama, a day at a time, sometimes an hour or minute at a time. Be kind to yourself, you are doing the best you can. ☺️

Hi mummy, do look up witching hour for babies. Basically it's when babies fuss a lot towards the evening and into the night, and sometimes there's no apparent reason. My baby would fuss a lot when evening rolls around, and tt had stressed me out a lot and I would get scared when night approaches. I still do sometimes (baby is alrdy 7month lol) ,but it does get better, and they fuss less/you'll be able to guess fairly accurately what they want (like maybe 70% of the time) Jiayou. Going back to work is a new challenge,but try not to worry too much and go with the flow.

Hi mummy, may i assume the baby is a newborn? Cause i was in your exact same position i feel super useless. Mainly cause i was recovering from csect and always in pain so i cannot carry or care for baby much. However after a few months, 2 months or so then i started to slowly learn ways to soothe baby and interact more with baby and all is good. Please please dont feel useless! You literally gave birth to the baby, that itself already shows your strength. And baby will never forget who his mother is.

Dont be dishearten. You just give birth & your strength has not recover. It take about at least 6 months to feel better. Baby is new to the world. But he/she can feel you. When you are feeling fustrated or emotional, they know & can feel it. But because they are so young, they duno hw to react and will just cry or fuss because they are as scared as you.

You have to try to be calm, baby can sense it when we are tensed. For example, when you’re speaking to your baby, lower down your voice and in slower pace. It takes conscious control and lots of practice. The more the baby fuss, the calmer you have to be.

babies like to "bully" their closest... so usually mum n dad will be the ones that babies will not hesitate to cry without a worry. my LO also kept crying and fussing ard us but act like a cute little obedient pumpkin in front of everybody else.

I am in the same situation... my LO tends to sleep so well in the day after his milk, but not at night despite the feeding amount and intervals being the same.. I feel stressed because I am staying with my parents, and LO cries so loud...

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