My mum-in-law is angry because my husband and I don't want to take our new baby to her house for a holiday party. There will be a lot of people there, and even our paediatrician advised against it because it's flu season and our baby's only 3 weeks old. How can we help her understand that it's nothing against her, we just don't want our newborn getting sick?

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I agree with Jamie. Your baby health comes first and I wouldn't bring my son either to a party full of people. The thought of people touching and cuddling him and not knowing where their hands have touched before touching my baby.... Plus, it will just overstimulate my son and it will be harder for him to sleep at night. And who will be up caring for him? Not your mother in law. Get your husband to talk to his mother since he agrees with you. If she still cannot understand, then there's unfortunately nothing you can do. You can try to pacificy her by letting her host your baby's 1st month if you'd like but if it's me, I'll just wait until the whole matter blows over.

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She's just eager to show off her new grandchild to the world. However, as a parent, our priority should be on our child's health and safety instead of how others (including close family members) might feel. If you do bring the baby to the party, you can expect that the baby would be passed around from person to person and of all the guests, one or two might have a runny nose, cough or just doesn't have a sense of hygiene. I wouldn't risk it. I'd tell her that sorry, but I can't risk my baby's health for her party. I'm direct like that, even blunt. The baby is her grandchild, but your child. She'll get over it.

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This is tricky. But I think there is no other way around it other than to explain to her nicely. Appreciate her effort for organizing the party. She probably just hopes to show off her grandchild to the guests. Perhaps you can offer an alternative and invite some of her guests to the baby's first month party?

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