It all started with people congratulating you on your pregnancy, and probably some were playing guessing games of your baby gender.
With you imagining all sorts of possibilities in the future and probably thinking, oh well, I still have a few months to prepare for childbirth & the arrival of the baby.
And then when the date gets nearer, anxiety starts to pick on you. What if there is complication during labour? What if I really needed an epidural? Will there be side effects? Or should I opt for a cesarean. Oh wait, how is the hospital bill size like? How much will be deductable through my medisave? Or how about my husband's medisave instead?
Apart those thoughts above, your nesting instincts sets in. You began to prepare for the arrival of your little one. Baby cot, clothes, nappy rash cream, milk pump. Oh milk pump! Will I have sufficient milk supply?
Many thoughts run through your mind. A mixture of joy, excitement in meeting a new member of the family, but also, somewhat deep down in there, anxiety of the procedure of labour.
And then the baby arrives.
Everyone congratulates you again. You're proud of yourself. And fell so deeply in love with your baby. Everything seems so perfect in the hospital, with gifts and beautiful wishes from people around you.
And here's the part you thought your nightmare has ended but its not.
Pregnancy can be a tough journey, how about motherhood?
Your body needed the rest. Everything seems like a blur at the beginning. Confused, joy, trying to learn to handle a newborn, worries and probably also feeling some pain from the wound.
You realized there's so many things about newborn. The amount of milk for consumption, whether your supply is enough. Are you latching correctly? Is the baby eating enough? Whats with the spit-ups, is that normal? Oh jaundice, lots of research on Google that prevents or helps with jaundice.
Is the baby drinking correctly? If not whats with the milk all over his/her mouth? Oh wait, is it the milk flow is too fast from the teats?
Hold on, colic? Any remedy? Ridwind, gripe water? Anything!
Reflux? Ger or Gerd? Is it serious?
Will the upcoming 1 month old vaccine cause fever in my baby?
And then you realized you're waking up every 2-3 hours for feeding. And sometimes wonder if they are taking enough naps for the brain development.
And not forgetting the suitability of formula milk (for non bf moms). Changing tins and tins to ensure the suitable formula which doesn't cause diarrhea, colic, spit ups, rejection of the bottle etc.
All these thoughts running through your mind, with probably 2-5 hours of sleep every nights.
It's tiring, really. And apart from that, due to lack of sleep, you started to forget this and that. Oh and postpartum hairloss, what the heck is that? Will that cause bald spots?
But to be honest, even with all these thoughts, we still do it without any regrets. Probably complaints, and... Maybe a little regrets deep in our heart somewhere (haha), but still, we do it all just for our little one.
And all we hope for, is for them to grow up healthily, happy and of course to bring them up as a kind individual, bringing joy and smiles to the world.
All these, just for our children.
And because we are a mom.
With love,
V