We had an affair for 8 years before getting married and my husband fought against all odds for having me in his life. But when our baby was almost 15 months, he cheated on me. I found out but because I was never 100 percent sure, I did not leave him. Though, all is over, that girl is no more, but the fact still troubles me that the man in whom I put my all faith in, cheated me. How do I get rid of these thoughts?

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i am afraid i can't tell you how you can overcome this situation, as i am also going through something similar. however, since you mentioned that you want to give it a shot, i would suggest that you start talking to your partner about all the thoughts you have in your mind. tell him why you find it difficult to trust him anymore. talk to him about what you think can help build it back. if required, you can also go for professional counseling. whatever you do, make sure that you are giving it your 100 percent, as else the cracks in the relationship never fill up.

Hi I think it is not possible to get rid of these thoughts. You can only try to make yourself busy all the time to distract yourself from having such thoughts and with time the pain will heal though I doubt totally gone. Focus on the husband good points but frankly the trust is broken. Sorry to say that but if he can cheat with you he can cheat with somebody else too. So if I were you I will still be on the ball for such incidents. But for the sake of your child , try to hold the family together and think positive thoughts whenever you can

i cant say that you will be able to forget it ever, though if you are busy with other things you will not think about it too often. that insecurity may always stay with you though. it can be difficult to move on and have a healthy relationship if you are not able to forget what happened. talk to him honestly about your feelings, and tell him that from now on, you want your relationship to be absolutely honest and transparent. i think both of you will benefit from visiting a therapist. do think about it.

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Trust is one of major components of a happy marriage and if its broken it hurts big time. I know you must be feeling shattered. Did you have a frank chat with your husband after that episode? This will take time to heal. If you are too depressed or angry, you can seen professional help from a counselor. You can also go to a marriage counselor along with your husband to sort things out.

"I found out but because I was never 100 percent sure" -> You might want to put it to strict proof. Given your relationship started out as an affair and you just gave birth, there is a high possibility then it could be a result of post natal depression or something emotional.

Whatever has happened is unfortunate and its not easy to forget or forgive so easily. Please seek professional help if you are getting too depressed or angry about it. Don't punish yourself. The fault was your husband's, he broke your trust.

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talk to your partner and visit a counsellor if it helps. you will eventually have to get these thoughts out of your mind if you want to have a happy marriage.