Yikes. It sounds tough when a child gets angry especially outside of the home! Ive had years of practice and i cant even handle my one year old tantrums and need my husband to
step in sometimes before i react in anger or annoyance. (When i was small its usually getting hit by my parents or yelled at, so i noticed i have the same anger issues too?! and i know i have to break the generational trauma)
Honestly a tantrum is pretty appropriate for a child to have but slowly u can ease him to express his anger/upset with consistent practice, modelling urs or husband own behaviour, reading some books on managing emotions (kiddy stuff). Even at four or five years old tantrums are common, and sometimes can almost be labelled as 'spoiled' behaviour. But u should know how u have brought up ur child. And the influence around him like grandparents, classmates, helper. What he sees he follows, what he receives he will express on someone else. So becareful because it seems like any factor could have led to this, but it can also be giving 'face' to the point where the child always get what he wants and yea thats tough.
Sometimes, rarely, ur child might have an underlying issue or behaviour which usually will be assessed and screened out by the Paediatrician if the behaviour is extreme or worrying. But i hope not.
BUT my worry here is ur reaction to the tantrum. Are u okay??? I dont think uve never brought him out or raised up ur son and know him very well.
Its the fact that u cried and froze. Thats not a normal reaction. There fight, flight, and freeze. Has this been going on for awhile?
If u need help, do reach out for counselling or see a gp or polyclinic for referral to imh psychologist. Maybe medication might help, maybe talking to a trusted person, maybe finding out more about managing children's behaviour and what can u do as a parent. Maybe u need a break from whatever is possibly affecting u right now. Whatever it is, i hope u will be okay.
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