Allowance for parents

Our parents nvr asked but I still give my mom monthly as my dad doesn't give her any and cz she also took care of me during pregnancy, confinement and soon baby when I go back to work. But it's a just a small amt of $700, sth tt is still within my means as I'm a working mom. I only hve 1 younger sis who's not married and still servicing her uni bank loan and helps to pay my parent's home bills and loan so I feel like it's my responsibility to provide for my mom at least. My hubby is lucky tt his parents hve no financial issues but he still occasionally gives them some money, help buy groceries, bring out for dinner etc. I think u need to let ur parents know abt ur expenses. They may not know how expensive family expenses are now esp with childcare. Then perhaps they wld understand and u can try to reduce the amt to sth tt u both can afford.

Ah I can resonate with this. My mom demands I give more even after I’ve had my little one. And I’m just starting my own family. It’s stressful and I hate it. I feel bitter every time it’s pay day. Some parents are unlike some parents who are understanding. Some parents are just vicious and cunning. No matter how they brought you up, instilling wrong values in you and only realising it was selfish of them as you grow older. I am the total opposite of my parents as I’m the 2nd child and growing up learning how to fend for myself. My mom especially is just plain selfish and disrespectful towards me and my husband. So it’s frustrating having to keep up with her demands until now. Sorry, I can’t say for others. Sure I am grateful over the years but I think somewhere somehow it’s just got to stop man.

Parental allowances should be given happily and willingly; so do not be peer pressured by siblings or friends to do so if you really can't afford to maintain the same amount. Times do change, and desperate times call for desperate measures. As children, we give allowances a a form of gratitude. As parents, they should be understanding of our changing predicaments and not "demand" us to still give the same amount or even ask for more. I believe in open communication and honesty in telling them your financial situation when your own family is growing. And I'm sure they will be understanding. If they are not, then you have a red flag there...

I dont give my parents allowance. They are working, and in fact earning more than me. They never ask for it, and still ask if i have enough. Because they understand the “sandwich” of providing for the children and parents. They do not want us, their children, to go through this, and explained to us even before we start working. They planned for their retirement and advised us to save for the future so that our children need no suffer on both ends.

Allowance for parent is a gesture of our gratitude toward our parent. Whatever you are willing to do or spend for and on your baby now, is exactly the same for your parents. So do give with a willing heart and within your mean so that you don’t start feeling bitter. For myself, I continue to give my parent the allowances as long as I can effort it. And I do so with a grateful heart 🥰

Work out a comfortable amount you think you can give on a monthly basis and explain to them how tough it is financially for you. It is hard when they have that old school mindset without understanding your situation. I still give a monthly allowance but lesser however when I see them I just pass some cash to make them happy. They equate money = filial piety = sadly.

Stop this toxic "give birth for a retirement plan" mindset. U didnt ask to be born, think u shld say it to ur parents upfront. Its extremely unfair to u. Its okay to give allowance at ur own means. But if its forced or if the amount makes u uncomfortable, u have every right to voice out man.

Both my parents are still working. My mum ask me to stop giving after I give birth , so I did. The $ was then used to pay for Ifc. It depends whether your parents NEED the money for day to day use, or it’s a “WANT”. You may want to talk to them and tell them ur concerns and see what they can do

Yes of cos. We should they brought us up well so that now we can start our own family. It's a form of gratitude that we give them. That is for me :) of cos we don't need our kids to do the same but we do need to be an example to them.

Yes still will give. I got my own child doesn’t mean they are not my parents. If very stressful, maybe consider giving less? Then share with them upfront