47 Replies
If he is a UX designer then it’s quite understandable that he will need to reference the designs of trending apps, in terms of behaviour and design. This is known as UX/UI in the tech scene. I am in the industry too and sometimes I do download apps to look at their implementation. However I would usually tell my wife about it especially when I download apps that may create a misunderstanding. Mostly we would browse the app together for a laugh. My advice is trust your Husband.
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Hi, I think, you can make things little simpler for you by visiting his behaviour in the recent past. Has he cheated you ever or you wonder about some strange things he does but there is nothing concrete that you can question him, and you let things go? I think you need to check out his activity on the phone. You need to find out whether he is really checking the design or is active on it. I think, one of these days, you will have to spy on his phone.
Do you have any reason to believe that he is being unfaithful? Hubs and me both work in product and technology so we have all sorts of random apps on our phones - I often log into his "dating apps" to see how the UI and UX is different for a man vs a woman and android vs iOs for some of these apps. I think in the tech world such behaviour is really normal. I have downloaded so many unconventional apps my self on his phone.
I've read similar stories on the Internet. Personally, I think that using dating sites for married people is simply unacceptable. It's another matter if a person is lonely. I think you will be interested in reading the article https://omtimes.com/2020/06/older-people-soulmate/ about finding your soulmate. Usually, everyone who is looking for a new relationship uses various dating sites. And this leads to ambiguous thoughts.
My first thought was how did you suddenly come about checking what apps he has on his phone? Was it incidental or intentional? If it was incidental, then I suggest engaging with him on a discussion about the interface vs other apps. However, it if was intentional, then there must be other factors involved why you felt compelled to check his phone. Is it intrinsic distrust or driven by other incidents?
Oh dear, this is a tough one. But yeah this sounds a wee bit fishy and too convenient. Maybe talk to him a bit more? If he has nothing to hide, then he wont mind talking to you about it, show you the app to reassure you. It might be an uncomfortable conversation to have but better to get it out of the way than have the issue eat away at you slowly. Hang in there!
I think the more important question to ask is if he has "matches" on Tinder, and whether or not he engages with them. Also, if he was a variation of this phrase on this profile, "here to check out the user interface," then it's probably nothing. But then again, trust your gut instinct. The fact that you're worried he has it on his phone is in itself telling.
If he says he's just checking out the design then that's fine since it's related to his profession but when he starts chatting and engaging with people he meets then that's when you might have a problem.Observe him first and give him the benefit of the doubt but once you notice red flags such as having a new password on his phone, confront him immediately.
Hehe, that sounds like a lousy excuse. Does he have an active profile? Was it logged in? I'd suggest you dig further into it. If he really downloaded it to check on the design, he would be very willing to explain to you the design features etc. If he hides his phone away and shoos you off, you know you've caught onto something sneaky.