Saying goodbye... to bf

it’s with mixed feelings and a heavy heart that i will be saying goodbye to breastfeeding when baby is 6m. i have endured months of painful cracked blistering bleeding nipples, engorgement , lack of sleep and rest, stress at work from a not-understanding boss and colleagues, in order to provide breastmilk for my baby. i don’t produce a lot but i have tried hard and to the best of what i can do, to squeeze out whatever i can. i will dread whenever people ask, is baby on bm or formula? as soon i will have to say shamefully, the latter only. people have no idea how stressful and sad it is. conversations in the shared pumping room- “wow i have so much milk i don’t know where to store!” ... “my baby is almost 1 year and i plan to continue as long as she wants!” ... “i just need to pump 10min and i have 300ml” ... all these made me feel like a failure. to rub salt into my wounds (literally also), my baby refuses to latch sometimes but will drink straight from bottle after he bites/pushes me away. and still i endured till now. i know kind people will try to console me. but i can not help but feel i am a loser. especially when a big factor is due to work stress. i can endure the painful nipples but the stress of work piling up and being questioned by my boss “have u done this? that?” when i go to pump and my work just piling up with no help because i had to pump. my boss had hinted i need to buck up. so i end up working late and later & later with my engorged breasts. i am often the last one to leave office. even when i’m pumping i’m so fearful, i keep checking my emails. this was a major factor why i also decided to stop bf. and i feel ashamed as my baby should be the most important but i let work dictate what i do for him... but i cannot afford to lose this job as times are bad now and i need to feed the family. it’s a long post, thanks for being here and TIA for any positive thoughts sent out to me. thank you... and blessed Vesak Day.

Vô danh

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Your boss is an asshole! Do not fret dear and just remember you gave her all the way to 6months! Not many mothers can say that, some mothers don't produce enough breastmilk to feed their babies from the beginning hence the formula. I used to be pro-breastfeeding, but now I am just pro-feeding. It is a tough journey and people are not always understanding of breastfeeding or breastmilk feeding mum's so don't blame yourself for doing what is best for your child. Just always remember you did your best, you made it this far, you struggled and prevailed. As long as your baby is happy, healthy and well, you are a great mother and no one can take that from you. No one. You did really well and you always will. The fact you want what is best for your baby and think your terrible mum is why you will be a great mum because you will never stop trying to be better. Keep your chin up dear and strive on

Vô danh

5y trước

i have to agree with you, yes he is... lol ... thank you so much dear. u have no idea how your encouragement made me smile a bit and feel much better. i will strive to be a good mum like u- positive and strong. thank you 🙏

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