10 Replies

I honestly think it's better that ur in-laws move out now. Perhaps they are also considering abt the potential conflict tt may arise with taking care of ur child in the same house. I would take it as a kind gesture of them to give me some space in raising my own family, esp hearing all the horrible stories abt in-laws or even own parents living tgt. And like they said, I'm sure they wld help whenever u need them . My in-laws and my parents do not live with us but they're always just a phone call away to help us. I was blessed that during my firstborn's first 2 years, my mom helped to take care of him when I'm at work. But now tt I've changed workplace to be nearer to home, I've to send my firstborn to childcare. Being a teacher I have to be in sch by 7am and childcare would just be open so most of the time my hubby will send him to cc. On days he work night shift the day before, my FIL wld come over early morn to accompany my boy and send him to sch instead. I think, it's good too not to fully depend on them, but I know they wld be willing to help in whatever way they cld.

You can’t control what your in-laws want to do. For all you know, they are the kind who are super afraid of taking care of kids. Also, they may decide to move because they feel you need more space now as you start your family. Isn’t it better that they move than they kicking you out? At the end of the day, you can only be in control of situations that you have the power over. And that includes finding external help, making backup plans, etc. We easily fall into the trap of stressing ourselves out over situations (and people) that are beyond our control. And because it’s beyond our control, that contributes to the stress as well. You can, however, choose to be in control of your perspective of the situation. Our disappointment in our situations sometimes really doesn’t help in making anything better. Choose better thoughts, thoughts that empower you and lift you up. You have the choice! 💪🏻

i am currently staying with my in-laws (waiting for our new hse to be ready). my in-laws and my parents are not helping us at all (cause they refuse to retire and also are afraid to take care of baby). my hubby and I have been managing well on our own although the initial 1mth plus was exhausting as we had no experience or any external help. sometimes i wish for some help so I could just relax for abit but when I see the way they carry baby or keep giving "old school" advices, I am glad I take care of my bb myself 😅 also my friends whose babies are looked after by in-laws, shared unhappy stories every week... anyway I cant wait to move out cause its really nice to have your own space and teach your bb the way you want to. i would also take it as a nice gesture that your in-laws are giving you more space for your soon to be 3 family 🥰 try to relax and let nature takes it course

😅 completely opposite from my situation! I've been living with my in-laws since I got married. and I cant stand them 🤣 I wished I had my own space without them nagging at me all the time. but trust me, your in-laws and my in-laws all have the same loving intention. Yours prehaps moved out to give you space to build your own little family, and prehaps knowing that when the child comes, conflict might arise, so giving you the space. I'm sure if they say they will be back often, it means they will be there for you anytime you need them, especially on those days your husband travels for work. believe that our parents, in-laws and family members all mean well even though sometimes it doesnt align with our wants/needs. hope it works out for you mummy! 💛💛💛

I just gave birth almost 3 weeks ago and in my hse there is just me, hubby, our new born and 2 dogs. We are coping very well without my in law and my parents. Even thou having to do confinement and I try to do certain things by myself but we are still coping very well. You will too don’t worry too much. It is way better living by yourselves as you do not have to listen to what the oldies will have to say or their way or upbringing the child. That’s what my mom did whenever she comes over for visiting. Always have something to say LOL.

I hear you. Maybe getting a helper will help ease your worries? That’s if you’re worrying about being alone. Speak to you husband about it. Maybe have your siblings or friends over to keep you company for the time being.

ya... planning to layout everything in detail to my husband. although he mentioned we can make it without them but on the other hand I still feel so unbalanced (and at times my husband has to travel for work). 😔 I have been telling myself about when they moved out I'll be able to save more money and oso to do wat I like for my house. but will all the unconfirmed situation I can't plan for new planning for my house. 😔 I'm the kind of person who likes to plan in advance but now I can't do anything. feels so frustrating.

Wow i think this is the first time i see someone wanting to live with their parents in law. Pls dont worry, you and husband got this!!! You will be an Awesome team! Just support each other ok.

My family and in-laws are living in another country, all living their own lives. My husband and I only have ourselves. I envy mommies who always have support from their family. 🩷

TapFluencer

my in-laws do help to take care of my kids in their own home... just to share that may be option if both sides are willing

Is it possible they want to give you space?

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