you are strong independent women I think it's better to divorce with your husband if he never change. I know there will be fight for custody of the kids but it's up to you, if not there's other ways marriage counseling, nearby social workers just call family service center and you just ask them if anyone can help with you and your husband situation, they mostly would suggest marriage counseling, so you guys get to know how you feel about each other, I know the pain of giving birth, we mothers have to go through all the pain while the husband just stand there and motivate us. plus don't forget 1th,2nd,3rd degree stitches for natural birth hurts alot too, man will never understand the pain of giving birth to a child, even if we describe it. but what a real man can do is support his wife and motivate his wife no matter what. that is important.
Maybe you can stand against your husband . I was once in this situation too, i used to be fear and following them in every situation. But then i realised this is my son , i gave birth to him. And then i started to fight against my husband. When he use his mother to threaten me, i screamed back at him “ OH SO WHAT? U THINK I SCARE ? THIS IS MY SON, NOT YOUR MOM SON. IM DOING MY BEST TO RAISE MY SON . AND YOU??? ONLY KNOW HOW TO ASK YOUR MOM FOR HELP! MOMMY BOY LA U! I PUT IN CHILDCARE THEN U UPSET? What right do you have to be upset when what you did is only “ASK MOM FOR HELP” ! Have u changed his diaper?? Have u feed him??? Have you put him to sleep??? NEVER! I did everything and now i put him into childcare then u complain??? U like your mother so much then u marry your mom la!!!! Marry me for what???
I feel sorry for your situation. Managing relationship with mil is really not easy. I suggest u have a calm talk with your husband. Let him know how you feel, and that while you know he is very close to his family, now that you two have a child, you need his support to protect your family. This refers to you three as a family unit. You are his child's mother, and you need him to protect you,not just the child. Protecting the mother is also protecting the child
After reading your post and replies, the issue seems to be your husband rather than your mil because he is allowing this to happen. He is supposed to defend you not help his mum to bully you. Stand up for yourself and be firm, don’t let him talk you down. Have a talk with him. You have every rights, as a wife and as the mother of your child.
Hi mum, I'm so sorry to hear that and your situation… let me hug you from this word… are you alone right now? Or you can go out somewhere to make your heart better? And I think you need someone to listen to what you want, what you feel and you need to try to talk about what you feel to your husband. And what your Mil have done to you….
I did talk to my husband multiple times. nothing resolve
Your husband is so toxic! I know it’s not for me to say but you need a new life!
Mum To Be