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First, as you already suspect — postpartum sex can be more pain than pleasure, especially if you've delivered vaginally, but surprisingly, even if you labored and then had a C-section. (And you should wait to get the green light from your practitioner to resume sex in either case.) After all, your vagina has just been stretched to its earthly limits, and possibly torn or surgically cut and sutured to boot — leaving you too sore to sit, never mind contemplate sex. Secondly, your natural lubrications haven't turned on (so to speak) yet, making you feel uncomfortably dry (especially if you're breastfeeding) where you'd rather be moist. Adding to the potential for discomfort: Low levels of estrogen cause the vaginal tissue to remain thin, and thin is not in as far as vaginas are concerned. But your libido has other problems to contend with postpartum besides the physical ones: Like sleep deprivation, for one.Your understandablly persistent preoccupation with a very little and very needy newborn, who is prone to waking up with a full diaper and an empty tummy at the least opportune times. Not to mention a number of other very effective mood killers (the pungent smell of day-old spit-up on your sheets, the pile of dirty baby clothes at the foot of your bed, the box of baby wipes on your night stand where there used to be scented candles and massage oil, the fact that you can't remember when you had your last shower…). It's no wonder l'amour isn't on le schedule. Will you ever live to make love again? Absolutely. Like everything else in your new and often overwhelming life, it'll just take time and patience (especially from your partner, who's almost certainly ready for this dry spell to end). So wait until you're feeling ready, or help yourself get ready with the following tips: Lubricate. Using K-Y jelly or Astroglide until your own natural secretions return can reduce pain — and hopefully increase pleasure. Buy them in economy sizes, so you'll be more likely to use them liberally — on both of you. Loosen up. Speaking of lubrication, drinking a small glass of wine can also help unwind you — and keep you from tensing up and experiencing pain during intercourse (just make sure you drink it right after a feeding if you're nursing). Another great way to loosen up is massage, so request one from your partner prior to closing the deal. Warm up. Of course, your partner's probably as eager as he's ever been to get down to business (after six weeks or more off the course, he's ready to go from zero to 60 in six seconds or less). But while he may not need much (if any) foreplay, you definitely do. So ask for it. And then ask for some more. The greater effort he puts into warming you up (time permitting, of course), the better the main event will be for both of you. Tell it like it is. You know what hurts and what feels good, but your partner doesn't unless you provide him a clearly marked road map ("Turn left, no right, no down, up just a smidge — there, perfect!"). So speak up when things heat up! Position properly. Experiment and find a position that puts less pressure on any stitches and gives you control over the depth of penetration (this is one time when deeper will definitely not be better). Woman-on-top or side-to-side are both great postpartum picks for those reasons. Whoever's in charge of the strides, make sure they're at a comfortably slow speed. Pump it up. No, not what you're thinking. Pump blood flow and restore muscle tone to your vagina by doing everybody's favorite exercise, Kegels. Do them day and night (and don't forget to do them when you're doing "it," too). Bottom line on your bottom line: Even if sex does hurt a bit the first time (and second and third time), don't write it off — or give it up. It won't be long (though it may seem that way) before the pleasure will be all yours again. And your partner's, of course.

You can start with putting baby in the care of your parents or a nanny so that it's just you and your husband. Take your time, relax, cuddles, massages and don't rush. Have lubricant on standby - due to the changing hormones post pregnancy, vaginal dryness is very common and even more so in breastfeeding women. Using a lubricant can help with the dryness, reduce pain, and it might even help make things feel good too. Most importantly, communicate with your partner -- discuss alternatives to vaginal intercourse if it hurts too much, such as oral or manual stimulation, until healing is complete. Tell your partner what feels good and what doesn't.

Go for a nice dinner with lots of aphrodisiacs - think oysters and strawberries with whipped cream. Have a glass of wine at dinner to relax yourself and remove some pressure and nerves. Have lubricant on stand by as you will be very dry. Have some towels on standby (incase you leak). Dim the lights, and light some candles to set the mood. Great if you have aromatheraphy scents as well. Start with lots of kissing and loving before you gently move into love making. Have fun mummy!

first up - keep the expectations really low and expect things to not work up as you may want....that will always help. make sure to put in time for foreplay as well as use lubes. the thing is, the first time after giving birth may be painful, or uncomfortable, so even if you are not able to reach climax or go till the end, try and enjoy the intimate time you spend, and do indulge in a lot of kissing and touching to make the hormones get back in place :)

What are the foreplay acts u recommend?

Hi, I think if your stitches have healed then you can go ahead as normally as you used to have sex before delivery. All you can take care is do not rush into things and take it slowly. Have a foreplay and slowly move towards sex and tell your husband to be gentle which I am sure he will be. And if you are not feeling fine through the intercourse, do not force to reach the climax for him or yourself. You can stop and do it the next time.

If you're not breastfeeding, I'd say take a glass of wine, have a warm bath and take things really sexy yet slow. It will be "dry" down there so yeah, lots of lube and take your time, else it might hurt. Don't force it though, if you don't feel up to it yet, then it can wait another day.

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Take it slow and lots of foreplay. If you had stiches make sure they have heeled and if all ok still go gently

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