I feel like a bad mom.

I’m a FTM. My baby is 7.5mo. I see lots of mummies in my EDD group discussing about enrichment classes, sending to school, sleep training and feedings. My case… I don’t follow anything nor do I train my LO. Both my husband and I only intend to send LO to PG at 24mo. She wakes up everyday at around 9/10am to drink a bottle then back to sleep till 1/2pm. I don’t sleep train her, so if she wants to sleep, I will make her sleep. If she doesn’t, then she can play her toys. Her usual wake time is 2 hours and the last wake time is around 3-4 hours. She usually sleeps at 9/10pm but will wake up at 12am, then she will roll with us till 1-2am. I tried BLW with her but she has no interest, she just keeps opening her mouth while looking at me so I switch back to traditional weaning. I only feed her porridge, purées, water and occasionally fruits. Whenever I see mummies cooking nice foods for their LO, I feel like I’m not doing well enough compared to other mummies.. 😣 Whenever mummies talked about enrichment classes or school, I’ll be full of ??? I feel like I’m not doing a good job haiz 😔 Is it wrong to follow baby’s pace? #advicepls #firstbaby #1stimemom

Vô danh

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hi! I've been in ur shoes before, my son is 3 and in the past we have been gifted flash cards, book series, arts and crafts, by relatives with good intentions. even recommended enrichment classes etc. but I did absolutely nothing, the stuff still collecting dust in a corner. my stand is very clear: I am the lazy, laid-back mommy and I feel education should be left to the professionals 😃 and that's what I informed the relatives when they asked about progress. even my husband asked me not to be so lazy.. so I just pointed finger back at him - why not he do it then? I've no regrets, my son is outspoken for 3y.o., is observant, active and expressive 😊

Vô danh

4y trước

Omg yes this!! I got my baby books, flash cards, toys and even DVDs but ended up not using them.. I offered her educational baby videos on YouTube instead and there was once a mummy made a comment like “wa you introduced screen time already your baby confirm more active la.” She didn’t introduce any screen time to her baby so I felt like I did wrongly. There’s even an area playgroup which made me feel even more stressful, but at the same time I can’t reject not going. (They are the ones who enrolled their kids in swimming, enrichment classes etc etc.) Hoping my LO will be like your son 🤞🏻

not easy being a FTM. I took care of my baby till 10months then go ifc. I just customise what is suitable for my baby in his sleep schedule. For food,I used traditional feeding coz my baby is super active n I cannot manage the food mess...so I don follow BLW... people gave alot advises to me but when I do it,it actually not suitable for my baby.. thereafter I learned to pace with my baby. Every baby is gifted and different from each other, I also learned that I shall not compare them to others. Also I shall not compare my motherhood with others... They might be facing other issues which we don know as well. Jiayou mummy!!

Vô danh

4y trước

I agree it’s not easy 😣 I just felt like I’m not doing enough and I’m boring my LO out because mummy didn’t arrange anything for her… 🥲 Thank you so much ❤️

Never feel bad about not keeping up with what other mummies are doing. You are what you are. How you bring up your little one and what you plan ahead for your child different depend on the pace of your child. My first child, I felt the same way as you. But I told myself every little gem of us are not same. We dont compare ourselves with other mummies. Who knows they may have helper to help, they have free time to do it, they wish to explore different activities for their little one. So dont ever feel bad. Perhaps if you wish to try it for your little one, you can do it when you are free. Hugs ❤

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Vô danh

4y trước

Dont ever feel bad. Ignore what people say. You can spend time like playing at the playground, go to park whatever you think would suits you and your little one. This is when you are free, aint tired or you feel like having a day out with her. Keep it at ur own pace and your style. If you are not good in cooking, you may try to explore little by little. It is definitely fine if it is not perfect. We learn as trial and error. Sooner or later, you will get the hang of it. Remember dont feel bad about it. Dont take it so hard and comparing it with other mummies. My first child not even sending to swimming class or any enrichment, she speaks alot, she is active and she is expressive. 🤗

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I think there is absolutely nothing wrong with following your child’s pace. Every child is different. I feel relationship building is most important when child is young. In fact, every bonding session, meal time, play time, conversations you have with your little one, is learning to her. Learning doesn’t have to be intentional, incidental learning through her daily experiences is so precious. Enjoy every moment with your little one. You’re doing great! (:

Everyone has their way of bringing up their kids. my daughter never went to any enrichment classes. My husband and I are the ones doing art, read etc with her and it is also bonding time. She keep up in school very well. We also don't sleep train her and we feed her normal food, none of the fancy stuff. do what you can and what you think what is best. Never compare yourself. you can learn and pick up what suits you and your family but never make it to bring yourself down.

Vô danh

4y trước

Thank you for the assurance! I really needed this ❤️

Waste of $ , should send the kids to the class of their interest, not parents’ interests.

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