I'm a first-time mom with a baby girl who just turned 1. MIL is relatively well-intentioned but gives tone deaf advice and can't read the room.
When I was pregnant, I had most of the symptoms morning sickness, exhaustion, backaches, swollen hands/feet, etc. MIL had none of these during all of her pregnancies but still thought it apt to give a little "wisdom"
During my first trimester, my morning sickness was in full swing. Most foods smelled disgusting. All my favourite things were no longer palatable and made me gag. I ate but barely. MIL didn't bother understanding me. She insisted I eat whatever was available at home.
When my belly was bigger and heavier, I started to get really bad backaches. MIL gave me her cushion cover filled with "medical-grade magnets," saying it would help if I rested on it. She believes in alternative healing and thinks modern medicine is a scam, btw. Idk how she expected magnets to relieve the pulls of a growing belly...
Towards the end of my pregnancy, my hands and feet were swollen. MIL thought something was wrong, so she recited holy prayers over a jug of water and asked me to wipe my hands and feet with it. 🥴
The postpartum period is when she really got on my nerves. I struggled with getting my baby to latch on for breastfeeding. MIL gave her children formula so she has no knowledge on BF. The day after I got home from the hospital, I couldn't get my daughter to latch, and she was crying so loud. MIL taught it was a good time to give some motherly advice. My breasts were exposed, mind you, and with a wailing baby in my arms. She told me motherhood was all about being patient, which was funny because she was testing my patience. And when she took a look at my daughter struggling to latch, she laughed and commented on my daughter's inability to suckle. It was bad that I was extremely hormonal and emotional. MIL just had to come in the room and do all that.
She crossed a lot of my boundaries during the rest of my confinement period. I didn't want to do the confinement diet btw because I don't believe in it. She insisted. Insisted I don't drink water either. Don't drink water then how to be hydrated enough to BF? My husband wasn't much help when I told him my feelings. Just said what to do? She's like that. 🙂
Anyway, daughter is already 1 but I'm still holding a grudge towards MIL. I feel like she made my experience miserable.