9 Replies
having a baby should definitely be a couple decision, and unless your husband is really ready for the second baby, i dont think you should force him to. ask him why he wants to wait. maybe he wants to spend time with you? maybe he feels that already there is a lot going on, and having another baby may add to the chaos? you can explain that having a baby now will mean you guys can spend the initial baby year being busy, then have the rest of your life to enjoy. or, maybe it is fine to wait and enjoy with him and your kid for now, then plan the second.
Most women are pre disposed to maternal instincts and we know when we are ready to take on the responsibility of a child. It does not come as easy with the men. Ask your husband what are his reservations about delaying starting a family. Just asking you to wait is not acceptable and even if you do wait,for how long? There are matters such as financial stability to be considered but that too has to be a logical reason. You cannot delay the decision indefinitely.
Having a baby is a great responsibility, so perhaps your husband is not ready for it and needs time to be mentally prepared for this. I suggest do not rush into things, and till the time he is ready, enjoy the time as a couple. Go travelling explore new places, do new things get to know each other more, basically have fun. And on and off keep bringing the topic of how things would be when you will have a baby, and with time he will also long to have one.
talk to your husband and ask him what his reservations are. maybe he is thinking about the financial aspect, or some other reason. try and understand his point of view too. once you both understand each others' point on being a parent yet again, it will be easier to reach a decision. also, tell him that your biological clock is ticking, so you should definitely try for a second baby by so and so time.
i would suggest you speak to him honestly and ask him the reason why. having a baby is a huge change and one of the biggest responsibilities ever. you may be ready and hence are unable to understand his reluctance, but he may have a million things on his mind that are preventing him from being ready to be a father. talk to him and understand his concerns, then maybe you two can work on it better.
Have you asked your husband why he is not ready to be dad? Is it emotional, financial or something else? If you guys sit down and have a really good talk about this issue, perhaps you can find a compromise and meet in the middle. If he still insists "not now", then ask for an actual timeline or deadline so that the both of you can work towards your goal of having a baby.
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move on, time wait for no man/woman. You are a woman, your bio clock is ticking each day.
Have you already asked him why?