I have behavioral issues with my kid. he is 3.8 years old and doesn't listen to me or any of the family members we chose to ignore many of his habits like chewing playing objects,toys or any things continuously etc... due to this he keeps suffering from infections . he's has started retaliating to what we say after he has joined hi school. doesn't even listens to his dad. He intentionally takes a lot of time in doing things like eating and doing homework.. .he is very fussy and i have to feed him day and night if i wont feed he will not eat anything. Whenever I ask him to do his homework he takes more than a hour to complete it which he can just do in 5 mins. He keeps fiddling and falling down when I ask him to study. Otherwise he's very bright but his teachers have also started complaining that he doesn't listen to them. I would have to repeat things 5 times he chose to ignore us a lot..he keeps fighting with his small sister too. It's only when I give him warnings he understands. He watches tv for 1 hr in a day and that too only dora mickey mouse and all.

Hi Pooja, I am sorry but when I was going through your concern above I felt that you are asking too many things from your boy who is merely 3.8 years old. And it must not be you but other family members also with whom he has to deal with. Like others also must be telling him not to do or not to do that or do this snd do that. Please understand that your child is JUST 3.8 years old and you cannot be expecting him to behave to the T. I feel that because of your continuous and consistent 'how you do this and that' he is showing behavioral changes. See please take it in a positive way. Sometimes we burden our children so much about how a particular things should be that we forget how we ourselves should behave with a child who is just a few years old into this world and almost everything is new to him. First of all, stop being his shadow. Let him be at times. If he is not eating let it be. No one xan be without eating and he will himself ask for food when he is hungry. Instead of going him to do things guide him. Be patient and do not expect perfection or total adherence from a 3 year old baby. Remember he is still a baby. Do not do comparisons with your younger one. Also try to figure out if the behavioral changes are sudden what is the cause. He might be feeling insecure you seeing him spending more time with your younger one or may be feeling attention deficit. Involve him in things and chores related to your younger one do that instead of feeling jeslous of her, he starts feel protective towards her. If there are so many things that you think your kid is not listening to then I am afraid but it means that as a parent you and your husband need to introspect where you too are lagging in meeting his expectations. And his longing will be nothing more than asking for love. And your love and attention, patience will rest all his anxiety. As I do not sense any behaviorial problem in him that requires professional help. You as pardons need to sit and analyse yourselves and see what is that you two are not doing or doing too much to make him behave the way he does.

dear mom, 3.8 years is still a baby! and i genuinely felt that you are expecting your little one to behave in a far more mature way than his age. from things such as studying and finishing his homework, i felt that it is a lot of pressure on him. my younger one is 3.4 and trust me, things are really chilled out at home and she is doing great, being her own self and also able to catch on with everything she is being taught. i think when we place too much emphasis on teaching our kids from such an early age, they get tense and stress out. why not let him enjoy this phase? it is already a time of lots of developmental changes and learning for him, so i would suggest let him learn and grow at his pace. if he takes an hour to do something, let him take that time. why the competition and the rush to finish it in 5 minutes? if he doesn't want to do something immediately it's fine no? let it be. he has an entire lifetime to get into the rat race and rush, so why not let him enjoy his baby days a little bit more and instead pamper him with more love, attention and just the silly things of childhood?

Hello, What I feel is that your child is dealing with attention disorder. As you mentioned that you have a younger baby at home, so he must be feeling left out. No doubt, the younger one would need more attention as she would be totally dependent on you, but the fact is that your son is also a baby yet. He needs as much attention and love as the younger one needs. Your son needs your emotional attention more than the little one, as she is too small to understand that you are loving her more or the brother. But your son is of the age when he would sense your emotional warmth and love. I suggest, spend as much time with your son, and even when you are attending to your daughter, make your son part of your chores with her, so that he feels that he is important for you. And do not regiment life for him. You have a younger daughter than him doesn't at all mean in anyway that he is big. You have a second baby at a safe gap of three years but the elder one is still a baby.

so how can a 3.8 year old ''intentionally'' take extra time to finish things, just to make life difficult for you? the reason he ''retaliates'' is that he is suddenly in a new environment and these are all very big changes for him. instead of judging him already and labeling him as someone who has behavioral issues, why don't you try spending more time with him and understanding him? he keeps fighting with his small sister, did you realize he is ''small'' too? please stop treating him as a grown up. i think because he is your elder one you are already putting too much pressure on him.

dear mom, i think you are stressing too much for your child, and he is only 3 ! i feel that your stress is eventually rubbing off on him, which is why there is so much confusion and attention seeking behaviour. why don't you relax for some time and take it easy, and also let your boy live the life of a little one? he will get into a competitive mode anyway when he grows up, so what is the hurry? instead, why don't you spend more quality time with him? take time out for just you and him and give him some undivided attention and love. i am sure it will make a lot of difference.

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