Can I tell my gynae she's being rude?

I know how u feel. 5 years ago, when i was overweight (not obese yet), i went to kkh private to seek help for pcos and fertility treatment. I chose a random gynae and he was nasty, kept talking about my weight without offering any other advice. I was so sad that i stopped going to hospital, and got scared to seek help for the next 5 years. 5 years later, i became obese and got the courage to see a gynae again thru subsidized route at kkh. As per protocol, Gynae told me very nicely to try my best to lose just a little bit of weight to conceive naturally. But when im not successful, we still proceeded with fertility treatment. I got pregnant successfully, with twins! At 20weeks, i transferred to sgh as i wanted lesser waiting time. All the gynaes, drs and nurses ive met since did not make such nasty comments about my weight. All they do is, prescribed me medicine like aspirin to avoid pre-eclampsia due to my weight. And gynae explained to me very nicely. Dont let the gynae bully like that. It may be tough love, but if u cant accept it, u shouldnt tolerate it. There are so many other nicer gynaes. The last thing we want is for you to fall into depression and love youself lesser due to such remarks from one gynae. All the best!

Both my subsidised route didn’t pass off any rude remarks about my weight. I was 100kg and standing at 160cm at 22 weeks pregnant. I’m now going 24 weeks and I’m sure I’ve put on a bit of weight. I think your gynae wants you to be careful of your weight as being obese is dangerous to your pregnancy and yourself. You can develop serious complications and might even lose the baby so before that happens, maybe she’s trying to give you some tough love and approach you harshly. All gynaes want their patients to have a healthy pregnancy irregardless of whether they know the person or not. I developed pre-eclampsia post-delivery and one of the causes is because of high BMI. I’ve been quite careful with what I eat as I’m afraid I would die while giving birth or worst, giving birth to a stillborn. If I were you, I will write a feedback to management and change gynae right away if I’m still going for private. It will be awkward for me to tell her off cause I’m not that kind of person. Also, I’m afraid she might have a come back and insult me further and crush my ego. That will be even more stressful for me and my baby.

i went for private gynae, paid alot more than subsidized. i was 70kg before preggy, and gained 24kg till my 38th weeks i was 94kg. my gynae rant n nag me on every visit for almost 1hr haha. i was hurt but i know its for my own good. so yeah i always smile n say thanks only. try to think positive mommy! but of cos u hv the right to tell the gynae how u feel, u paid money one leh. cheers!

Im on privatised route and was overweight for my second pregnancy. My gynae too nagged at my weight (and my fetus weight) every visit, even for my first one he also nag la. And my husband too. But I will just laugh it off or agree with them. No hard feelings cause I know it's for my own good (I had GD for first kid and ended up emerg c sec), but I still eat when im hungry 😂

I am overweight and on subsidized route. So far I’m in early pregnancy but the doctors and nurses don’t make nasty comments like these. In fact, they would focus on other things like generally reminding me to eat healthy and monitor my glucose levels because I have pre-gestational diabetes. But never directly commenting about my bmi or about maintaining my weight.

i’m overweight too! UK20-22. but nurse/doc never ask me to lift up my belly so far. gynae didn’t comment on my weight as well. ftm here. i think you can share your concerns with gynae tell her to use better words saying that you’re very affected by the words she use ! stay happy mummy ! ☺️☺️

I think the doc is trying to just let you know more about your health but if you find her remarks rude maybe you can let her know you feel sensitive about such comment and I'm sure she would try to make things better if it doesn't change do give a feedback to kkh and also change a gyane.

Wow this gynae has no professionalism.. maybe you want to consider changing gynae? I’m also overweight when I got pregnant but under subsidised route at kkh. The doctors and nurses there also didn’t say anything abt my bmi..

nothing wrong standing up for yourself especially when you are hurt. surely you don't have to be and won't be mean/rude like her... just let her know her words hurt you or write in to kkh as a feedback, whichever works better for you 😊 jia you!

You are paying for her service, you should not feel uncomfortable at all during your visits with her, especially you are under private. I am over weight too n under subsidiary, but I've never encounter anyone who consulted me make such remarks.