6 Replies
I don't know what you should do, but here are a list of things you should not do: 1. Do not tell her to breathe - she knows and has read the same text book that you have. If she does not want to breathe, let her be - it's annoying to have someone "breathe down your back" to breathe. 2. Do not get annoyed at her, nag her, sush her because she is screaming too loudly or do anything that would generally piss her off. Just suck it up and roll with the punches. Do not even show a flicker of annoyance on your face - because she will catch it. 3. Do not use your phone to real time update friends and family about her situation, 1 or 2 updates are fine - but not all the time- the focus needs to be fully on her. 4. If your wife does not want you to see her neinnei or hoo ha because she is self-conscious - don't be kaypoh and do it anyway. Just follow her wishes. 5. Don't ask her if it hurts - duh - it bloody hurts. You try squeezing a watermelon out of your manhole. 6. Don't fall asleep - play with games on your phone or watch a football match. 7. Leave snarky comments to yourself - for example, after she gives birth, she will still look atleast 6-7 months pregnant, don't need to comment on that. 8. Don't argue with her if she wants to change the birthplan. 9. Don't complain that you are tired, hungry, cold, seat is uncomfortable, she is squeezing your hand too tight, your hands are tired from massaging her, etc. 10. Don't tell her she looks like crap, or knackered, or in pain - lie through your teeth if you have to - but tell her that she is amazing, beautiful, most gorgeous mum ever, how proud you are of her etc. Good luck papa - do tell us how you survived it in the end!
Here is an article with tips from dads who have been in the labour ward: http://www.babycentre.co.uk/a1072/dads-10-ways-to-be-the-perfect-birth-partner Basically, it is mostly about getting information such as knowing what your wife wants and knowing what to expect. Will also be helpful to prepare the contact list of people you will need to text once your baby is out. And here’s a useful cheat sheet on information of the labour process that you should know: http://www.babycenter.com/0_a-childbirth-cheat-sheet-for-dads-to-be_8244.bc Just be there, physically and mentally, for your wife. :)
Be there to support wife fully to go through the labor pain. My husband knew I do not wish to have epidural and thus throughout the process he encouraged me by reminding me to use breathing strategies for pain relief. Also, his sacrificed his arms and hands for me to hold during the contractions pain (and end up in some bruises).
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Not play games on his phone in the labour room - my hubby really pissed me off as he was more into the video games then me - my labour was 10 hours long though.
thanks