Does a child complete a family or ruin it?

My soon to be ex husband just revealed that he dated a 25 YO barely a week after we spoke about splitting up amicably this was slightly less than 2 months ago. We've been together 7 years, 5 of which we were married and had a child together last year. She turns 2 next year. We're on a preplanned family trip with the in-laws and they have no clue what's happening. He's been keeping to himself this entire trip (12 days) and it was last night I found out why. His main objective coming to this trip was to "find himself". Not to spend time with his daughter. I won't ever understand that, but it isn't about me. Then I found out he took someone on a business trip (once for sure, the one right before this family trip, and a possible one before that too). He made a Moon Phase bracelet of their dates after she blocked him on text and on telegram.. I know why I feel disappointed, because I picked him years ago, when I was adamant not to get married. And I wanted to have our daughter when I've never really liked kids and he's the one wanting to try for a family. Now he says he's after freedom. Wait, no. Expansion. He wants to experience all that life can give. And yes, parenting feels like a chore. The more we talked about what went wrong with us. The more it's revealing it was him being toxic and selfish and all the things he "wanted" me to do to salvage this, I did. He was just too toxic to see that I did try. I know he loves her as her father. But he doesn't know how to be one. And watching me treat her like she's the centre of my world, makes him disgusted because he used to be the centre of that world until the toxicity pushed me away from him. I just need to vent, cause I have 1 more day on this trip pretending to be a happy wife in front of the in laws, but I just wanna hide from the world.