Aww sayang, trauma dari episiotomy tu betul-betul normal, banyak mum friends aku ada cerita yang sama! At 61 days, your body should be mostly healed lah (though emotionally lain cerita), tapi before you try anything, mesti consult your doctor first, dia boleh check kalau jahitan dah betul-betul okay and boleh tenangkan your mind about the healing. Once doctor gives the green light, start slow je, maybe start with light touch masa cuddling, tanpa pressure untuk go all the way, dan tell your suami how you're feeling so dia faham and boleh sabar dengan you. A lot of us found out the fear tu lebih sakit daripada the actual sensation once we relax, tapi setiap orang berbeza, so your feelings are valid gila!