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Often parents who are experiencing a miscarriage turn to the baby’s grandparents, other family members, friends and professionals (including nurses, clergy, and health care providers,) but can’t find the words to express the kind of support they need. As a supportive person, you may feel helpless, threatened or vulnerable. You may even want to avoid dealing with the loss or wish the parents would hide their grief. You can turn these natural feelings into support for the grieving family or friend. How Can Family And Friends Show Support? Listen, Listen, Listen! A person who has experienced a miscarriage may need to tell his/her story repeatedly. Show you care by your attentiveness, gestures, and eye contact. Be prepared to talk about the baby. Hearing others say the name helps a grieving person heal. Know when to be silent… sometimes it is best to say nothing at all. A grieving person may just want someone to listen. Be aware that grief has physical reactions as well as emotional reactions on the body. Physical reactions include: poor appetite, disturbed sleep patterns, restlessness, low energy, and other pains. Emotional reactions may include: panic, persistent fears, nervousness and nightmares. Encourage your friend or family member to call you or reach out when they experience these feelings. Encourage the grieving person to express pain and stress. By working through feelings such as anger, guilt, sadness, doubt and frustration, the normal process of grief and healing occurs. Continue to encourage communication. Understand that grief is an individual process that is bound by no exact time frame. This frame of time involves finding ways of living with memories and the pain associated with the loss. Reassure the grieving person that their feelings and reactions are normal and necessary for healing. Remember that specific dates or events such as the anniversary of the loss or the expected due date, may trigger an emotional response. Encourage communication during this time. Perhaps a card or small remembrance.

As a person who experienced a miscarriage before, this is really true! Thank you for sharing these tips with others. :)

I didn't suffer a miscarriage but I did went through and had etopic surgery when I was about 5 weeks pregnant. I found that it was very comforting to have my family and friends just being there for me and it was so much easier to move on when no one talks about it to me. Sure, there were nights that I would curl up and cry in my bed but my sister was always constantly around to make sure I was distracted or occupied with something. I think you could do the same to your sister to and if she does break down, just offer her your shoulders and give her tons of hugs. I feel that this is the best way to help her since nothing you do will ever change what has happened. Best is to help her move on.

I'm so sorry to hear that.. I think just letting her know that you are available if she needed someone will be sufficient. She will probably need some time to come to terms with the situation. A simple "hi" over WhatsApp or a phone call in the evening for a short chat may help. Simple gestures to extend the invitation to chat if she needed it. However, if she had made know that she would prefer to be by herself, respect her space and only check in once in a while just to see how she is doing would be good. If you feel like you would like to do something, you could make a tonic soup or some porridge and bring it over to her.

VIP Member

The healing process of miscarriage can be difficult for not just for the lady but also for the entire family. So when you say you don't know how to show your support, I completely understand your situation. The most important thing that the family can do to help the expectant parents and especially the mother, is to cheer her up. In addition, spend quality time with the parents and be alert for any signs of serious emotional disturbances. Please take a look at this link that explains the 4 golden rules to survive a miscarriage: http://www.theindusparent.com/4-effective-tips-to-survive-a-miscarriage

Learn how to wait for her to open up. People deal with loss differently and she may need time to process this tragedy. Just be patient and be ready to offer a crying shoulder and words of support when she does open up. Tell her that no trial is insurmountable and that she has a family who loves her no matter what. Wishing you and your sister the best.

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Sometimes just being there with her is a big help. Don’t push her to talk. If she wants to talk, be a sounding board and never judge her actions. Let her know she can come to you anytime she needs support during this difficult time she is going through,

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Just let hr know that you are always there for her to talk to if she needs to. Give her time to heal and check on her very often, especially in the initial days as she's probably feeling very low.

She needs time and space to heal on her own. Be there for her when she needs you and give her the support that she needs, not necessarily in words though:)

Be there for her. Don't judge and give her time to grieve well. Grieve has different stages and everyone becomes better and takes time in their own ways.

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