30 Replies

Do not bother much about such questioning because your inlaws are not in a state to understand your situation and even if you sit and talk to them they won’t be able to digest your explainations as they don’t want to understand. So better focus on your future plans and keep patience to handle such situation.

...answer in a straight-forward and firm manner that you are not ready yet and you'd rather plan things out because you care for the future of your future son/daughter. I guess when they see that you serious about this answer they will respect it. Show them that this decision is agreed upon by you and your husband.

If you're on the same page as your husband, talk to your in laws together and explain to them that it is entirely you and your husband's decision whether or not to start a family. You should also try to understand where your in laws are coming from, they may just be too excited to have grandkids running around.

Discuss with them your plans and feelings. Tell them how uncomfortable you feel when they discuss these things in public. Make your husband initiate the conversation so that they understand it's something which bothers both of you. If they understand great, otherwise just deal with it as calmly as possible.

I feel for you!! As you rightly mentioned the best part is husband is with you on this. Although you might be uncomfortable, it would help if both of you sat down with your in-laws and talk about it as other people have rightly mentioned. Sometimes they are just very excited and cannot contain it :)

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The best solution to this problem is to directly tell them that it is not something you have in mind at the moment and that you are not ready. They are not completely aware of your financial and physical state to comment on your future. It's always better to be transparent and talk things out.

What does your spouse say? If she's cool about it, think you shouldn't worry at all. Just focus on your current plans, go travel and explore the world. Your in-laws won't be handling the baby, so they shouldn't be forcing one soon. Just remember, everything has a right time. Don't hurry!

Just let them know that you're not ready for kids for now, and that it is a mutual agreement between the both of you. They can ask questions but ultimately, the decision belongs to the both of you and I don't think anyone else should have a say in what a married couple should do.

Thanks Samantha! I was thinking of having such discussion with them soon, just needed some encouragement I guess. Best part is my husband is totally with me on this, so that keeps me composed. Let's now hope my in laws understand, will be a major relief for me.

I would directly talk to my relatives/friends whoever is bothered about our child in such a situation and ask them to relax a bit and leave the decision on us and may be tell them about our priorities at the moment so that they understand it better.

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