Oh mama, first of all, please don't be too hard on yourself, nobody has it perfectly figured out, and honestly most of us are just surviving day by day! The two things that helped me most were syncing the kids' nap times as early as possible (so you get a window to eat, rest, or do one quick chore), and lowering the bar on housework, laundry and sweeping can wait, but your sanity cannot. My neighbour actually swears by setting up a safe play corner with a playpen or activity mat right outside the bathroom door, so her toddler could see her and didn't panic, which sounds simple but honestly it's a game-changer for the toilet situation you mentioned. The other practical thing is to batch cook on your husband's off days, soups, rice, simple dishes, so you're not scrambling alone on weekdays. It is genuinely hard, but most mums find that once you accept "good enough" instead of "perfect," the anxiety does ease up quite a bit.