Hi dear, I can hear how much pain you're going through, and my heart really goes out to you. Before anything else, please reach out to a counselor or trusted family member, this is heavy stuff and you shouldn't carry it alone. A few of my mum friends who've been through relationship troubles found talking to a professional (not just investigators) really helped them think clearly about what's best for themselves and the kids, if any. I won't comment on the methods you mentioned, but I do think getting proper legal and emotional support, maybe a family lawyer or therapist, is safer than going down that road. They can guide you properly on what's actually admissible and what protects you . Hang in there, okay? You deserve clarity and peace of mind.