7 Replies
You can start conversation by asking her questions e.g. her previous working life, travelling experiences, child birth and etc. I find eldery likes to share their experience in the past. I guess your MIL will be very happy to chit chat about her life. Also, you can send her some gifts during Mother's Day, her birthday, or special occasion such as mooncake, dumpling and etc. I find activities such as shopping, cooking and baking together are good ways to bond with MIL too. The most important rule of thumb is pay respect to MIL and accept her shortness and believe both of you will become a good friend. After having kids, actually I find it more conflicts between MIL as elder tends to give opinions and critiques on the child upbringing. The challenge will start after you have a baby. Thus, foster a good relationship even before you have conceived is a good headstart!
Rope your husband in! I love my MIL! Create simple daily conversations, do stuffs together, share your thoughts with her (always hold an open mind to her comments) and show care and concern to her. Action speaks louder than words mama :) Simple methods of showering concern will include stuffs like ensuring she takes her meals regularly, accompany her watch tv or variety shows, chit chat with her, have strolls or short walks with her, organise family meals or gatherings etc. Boost engagement and involvement between yourself and her and things will work out just fine :)
Invite her over for dinner, shopping or simply a coffee treat whenever you can. If you are not comfortable with meeting up with her alone, rope in your husband or even your own mom. If she is a great cook, ask her to teach you how to make your husband's favourite childhood meal or just open up to her gradually and be her friend. I usually find little acts of appreciation and kindness always help when dealing with parental figures. Don't overdo it though, just be yourself and show her that you respect and appreciate her maternal knowledge :)
I think simply reaching out to her, chatting with her would help. My in-laws enjoy sharing about their past experiences and would appreciate a listening ear. If she enjoys traveling, bringing her overseas may be a good way to bond too. :)
yes just start reaching out to her with simple conversations. ask for her opinion on things (be ready to use those!) also, involve your husband in this.
Don't need to involve her so early - probably when you are already pregnant? When ur pregnant mostly it is gonna be baby /pregnancy talk and errands
Take her out for tea, share your day with her, spend some time at her place. Elder folk also love to share their stories :)