Don’t attend to her immediately when she calls for you. Give her 5 minutes, even if she’s screaming. She gradually learns to self soothe and be independent, as well as less scared of being alone. Also, when your husband’s home, let him be the first one to go to her and comfort her. This works best if she sleeps in a separate room..
Stop the dream latching. It helps a lot. Yes, she will scream for now, but will get used to it after a while.
For bottle feeding, let your husband and grandparents do it. Don’t be anywhere near here during those feeds. It might be tough initially, but it’s better for her to scream now than after you go back to work. When my daughter rejected the bottle for 3.5 months, my husband would rough it out with her for at least 30minutes before I stepped in to “rescue the feed” by latching if needed. Because of his perseverence, she’s finally drinking very well from the bottle.
Stop the latching before naps and sleep to dissociate feeding and sleeping. That would mean you’ll need a new way of getting her to sleep ie. Start sleep training. There are many ways (you can go check them out 🙂). There might be a lot of crying initially because she may feel like her world is turning upside down all of a sudden, but be brave and make all these changes. It’ll be worth it for everyone. My LO refused the cot for a long time, and then later on, patting firmly helped. Then it didn’t work after some time. Carrying/rocking also didn’t work. So for my case, we had no choice but to use the cry it out method. But it works, and there’s no psychological scarring. She’s still a very happy girl. And she sleeps in her own cot in her own room. I still breastfeed her, but she’s alright with bottle feeding, and she’s alright if i’m away for a couple of hours.
Hope everything goes well for you ❤️ The training is hard for everyone, especially the mummy and baby, because of the connection between both. But it’ll really be okay. And your husband will be able to bond better with baby, as well as spend more personal time with you, once baby is more independent.
Cindy Chen