Hi I hope things are better for you now. As others have suggested, I think it's best you go for counselling. I have porn addiction, so I just want to share my perspective as a woman, although it may be different for men.
I surf porn ALL my free time. I'm not even horny, it just gives a high and there's nothing else that's more stimulating and there's always new content. And the longer it's been, the more hardcore the content needs to be to be interesting. As such porn preferences are definitely not real life preferences. It doesn't really affect my sex life I think, I don't reject my husband's advances unless I know I am quite dry and it's unlikely to change despite his best efforts. Sex can be scary too because things and reactions aren't as you expected (from porn). My husband knows I watch porn, but not how much I really consume, and because of how hardcore and weird the s*** I watch is I don't share it with him either. It is intensely private so I can understand why your husband felt violated and ashamed. He's also an idiot as he doesn't know how to hide his history and downloads. 🙄
I feel your husband may be unsatisfied with the marriage, his own performance in bed, or ashamed of his hobby. All these do need a counsellor to help work through. Last tip, the only way to kick this addiction is to be so busy/tired you have no free time to even think about it. Because honestly if you have a phone and no one is looking over your shoulder, that's what I'll be surfing on default.