Perhaps you can tell her you are going out if she wants to come over even if you not intend to. If she insists to come over then let her be, you just have to leave for a stroll, coffee, movie or shopping etc. Whether your hubby wants to go with you or not, let him decide. He may want to spend some time with his mother. To go over to your in-law's house, you need not have to follow your husband everytime. Just my two cents worth.
Just let her know the schedule of your family visiting her and to show that u r still visiting her regularly. Let her know u have other commitments that having someone else around in the house make things difficult.
wa. I rather go over than she comes over. hahahaha I go over. I can decide how long to stay there. she comes over I cannt tell her how long she can stay here.
you can try talking to her letting her know that we have got our stuff to do too. that's why we can't go over. but when we are free we will go over.
Talk to her or get your hubby to talk to her so that you all can come to a compromise.