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How l handle arguments? I kept quite for a while. I don't talk. I just keep quiet until he smells l'm really pissed off. When he asks me something or about it l'm still quiet. Sometimes l stare at him with a blank face. But he's always kind enough to understand me despite of my reactions. And even if we're in the middle of arguments l put my anger aside at meal times. I still served him or put a rice on his plate and offer him something. And then right after, l'm quiet. Trying to deal with my anger all alone thinking. And he's quiet too and sometimes trying to please me. But at the end of day, whatever the case. Whether it was his fault or not. I go to him first and hug him when things are cool. And that's the time l talk about my concerns. He knows all of this. He knows l can't go to sleep like that. So he waits until things are Okay between us.
I don't know if it works, but there's a study that if you stare at your husband your heart will beat faster and make you fall in love more. So when we are into petty arguments and even the most annoying ones that might lead to bigger ones, I swallow my pride and stare at him. A few seconds later, he's making fake suplado looks at me. Then we will both be like teenagers and start the cute fight and see who will give in with "halika na nga dito". Try it! Practice the art of not having small fights with your spouse until you get used to it. It should be easier to get rid of future bigger fights :)
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Take a deep breath. Sometimes we are too emotional which results to shouting etc. Once you are a bit calm, tell your husband your concern so you can resolve the issue.
When you're mad at him, don't yell especially when your children are around. Talk to him in private. And don't let the day pass without you guys agreeing on something.
I know it's hard, but sometimes you have to breathe in and breathe out. For a few minutes, it will give enough time to calm down before blurting out your anger.
Learn to control your emotion and refrain from bursting out especially when the kids are around. Just hold onto it. Don't utter a word because it might worsen.
Kristina Cebanico