Seems like Mil will want alot of time w baby

I agree that grandparents would want to see your child more when the baby is out! I personally find that it's not a bad thing, as you do get extra help when you really really need it. Or even just to go on date nights with your hubby. I would really encourage setting routines early for yourself and your baby, cause it really gives me predictable breaks. It also prevents my baby from going overtired, which happened for me and it was terrible for me. At the same time, I would suggest coming to some agreement with your hubby first on frequency / days / time of visits, and like you said to have him front the communication with his parents. Perhaps start with saying the first 3 mths is really tough (it is) and that you will definitely bring bb over to visit them when things are more stable and manageable. They'd also want to play with a well rested and cheerful bub, rather than an overtired and cranky one. Can try to say that you will keep things fluid in the beginning and you can review frequency of visits again. I did stay with my in-laws for confinement and subsequently visited them every other day after confinement. I'm currently 3mth pp and I can tell you it is very tiring to bring baby over so frequently. Just thinking about settling the bub to a calm mode for the car ride and packing the bag is tiring 😅 Additionally, I didn't think of setting a routine for my baby and we were home very late on those days, which means she slept 10-11pm. I learned the hard way that babies have incredibly short awake times, by the time you make it there it's probably sleeping time already (during first 3 months)😅

I used to see my PIL 2-3x a monthafter getting married. After I give birth I see them 2 - 3x a week. Haha they want to see their grandchild which I can understand. Now my MIL comes over to our house to oversee the helper on weekdays. Even then they might come over on Sunday as well. Usually stay till 7 plus. Have to get used to it. But seeing them building a close bond with baby it is worth it. If my parents stay nearer it will probably be the same as well. Have to make it clear that you are the mum and while you appreciate their advise you choose your parenting style. Hint subtly if there's anything you don't like or get your husband to tell them.

Best is to speak to your husband about your MIL. Personally, I’m in a similar situation and my in laws have been coming for dinner almost every other day. Some pros: 1. They bring dinner 2. When baby is out, they will be able to help and you will be able to get some much needed rest. If you do want to keep things to your way and own routine, best way is let hubby speak to his mum on your requirements. I never speak to my MIL with things I’m unhappy about. Usually let hubby handle it.

I think have a nice chat with your husband? And let him know that you prefer to have more time alone etc. if you were to keep silent, I believe these would build up and cause more stress while handling a newborn. All the best!

sorry to say that more to come. unless you list or state clearly now. example next time baby is out will come back once a week etc. if not no agreement next time very headaches

If you get along well with MIL, having her help will be a bonus with a newborn / baby. It’s nice that she asks instead of popping by unannounced and unwelcome... 💕