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I started to prepare my elder kids once I found out I am pregnant by bringing him/her to go for gynae check-ups and tell him/her about the ultrasound pictures. Also, I bring my kids to buy clothes, toys and other baby necessities together and let them choose the designs. During the normal days, I will ask my kids to help me to apply stretchmark lotion on my tummy, also singing to the baby in the belly. Once I feel the baby's movement, I will quickly ask them to come and feel it too. My baby no.2 likes to sleep on my tummy at night to feel the baby. Also, I borrowed books from library for them to understand what to expect. It is more for my 2nd child as he never experience to have a younger sibling before. For my eldest daugther she is more understand of what is really going on and thus normally she will request me to show videos of childbirth (animated one and not scary one) to her.
How old is your elder kid? I borrowed books from the library that talks about a new baby arrival. I read to him and explain to him that his is also going to have a new baby brother/sister. Basically is to get him involve in the whole process. Eg. bring him along for your checkups, bring him along when you go shopping for baby stuff. Get him to pick out something for his brother/sister. One very important thing I did was to get my family members and close friends to prepare a gift for him too when the baby is out. Many times, people come visit you and your baby at the hospital bearing gifts for mother and baby. And the older kid is left out. When he sees all the attention on the baby and all the gifts, jealousy may form. Congratulations by the way!
My kids are only a year apart, so it was not easy explaining another addition to a child who was below a year old. My hubby and I showed him books of a family with 2 children, showed him scans and were not quite sure if he even understood what was going on. But as soon and baby #2 came along, he got it. And he started accepting it pretty well, probably because he had a buddy to play with (read: fight with) every single day!
I brought my son to my gynae appointment whenever it's a simple routine check, i will explain to him it's baby inside. once we are able to confirmed the gender, i will bring him and get him to choose a present for the small baby. Get him involved. So they would not feel left out.
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As soon as i found out, i did tell my elder boy, he was 2 plus then. However he only started understanding more when he saw my tummy expand. I just kept talking, explaining and showing pictures.
Reading books about babies,visiting friends who have infants and bringing the elder kid along for the doctors are ways to let them know a sibling is coming along.
thanks