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Aww, I'm really sorry you're going through this, that's such a heavy feeling, and totally valid. A few of us mums in my circle have been in your shoes, at least pagsabi ng "not yet" from the doctor, and ang sakit talaga ng pag-antay, lalo na when you're ready na emotionally. Pero hold on, baby, timing will come, and maraming success stories ng mga kaibigan ko na nag-try pa ulit after getting that news. Rooting for you, and please don't hesitate to talk to your OB about your feelings too, or maybe a counselor, kasi emotional support talaga matters during this journey. You will be a mom, it's just not the time yet.