Feeling so overwhelmed and drained

Question

It took me a lot of courage to talk about separation.I think I have had enough. I am doing my confinement but I aint resting. Everyone incl my spouse told me to rest, to minimise walking but he isnt helping much, beside feeding LO.I wash bottles until I am sick of it. When I told him if I dont do it, nobody will. He assured me he will, but man I was so wrong.He didnt change the diaper for 6hrs. He didnt wake up when LO was crying so loud for several minutes (yes he is a deep sleeper). He didnt wash the bottles till there was once there was insufficient clean teat and bottle to be used.Whenever he help out with changing diaper, he is the one sitting down while I got to stand and bend until my back ache.He is on paternity leave for 2 weeks, but arent helping much. He can watch Netflix while feeding LO. Am I being too anal about the things he had done, or I was right to be upset about? Sometimes I look at my girl, I asked myself why on earth I gave birth to her.

Lucinda · Answer

Oh mama, it sounds like you are going through a really tough time. It's completely understandable that you're feeling overwhelmed and drained. It takes a lot of courage to talk about separation, and it's important to take care of yourself during this challenging time. It's not being too anal about the things your spouse has done. It's completely valid to feel upset about the lack of support and help you're receiving, especially during your confinement period. You deserve rest and help, and it's okay to express your feelings about not getting the support you need. It's important to have an open and honest conversation with your spouse about how you're feeling and what you need from him. Maybe he doesn't realize the extent of his actions and the impact they have on you. Communicating your needs and feelings is crucial for finding solutions and working together as a team. Perhaps you can create a schedule or plan together for taking care of the baby, household chores, and ensuring you both get the rest you need. It's essential for both parents to share the responsibilities and support each other during this time. Remember, it's okay to ask for help from other family members or friends if possible. Taking care of a newborn is a team effort, and you don't have to do it all alone. And please, don't be too hard on yourself. It's normal to feel overwhelmed and exhausted, but it doesn't mean you regret having your girl. You are a loving and caring mother, and it's okay to have moments of doubt and frustration. Take some time for self-care and try to find moments of joy and connection with your little one. You're doing an incredible job, mama. Hang in there, and remember that things can get better with open communication and support. Sending you lots of love and strength. https://invl.io/cll6she