Sayang, I can really understand why you're feeling overwhelmed, 4 bulan je lepas bersalin, and this must be such a shock. But please lah, jangan decide sendiri dulu, you need to see your doctor as soon as possible, ideally this week, to talk through everything properly, okay?
Your doctor can explain all your options clearly, and help you and your husband decide what's best for your family's situation, there's no rush to decide alone. Whatever you choose, you deserve proper medical guidance and support, and that's something only they can give you properly.
Take care of yourself, dear.