Paano niyo na oovercome ang pag mimirror niyo sa ugali ng toxic parents niyo sa parenting niyo? Help

Ay sis, alam ko yan feeling, kasi minsan nagsisigaw ka sa anak mo tapos biglang nakikita mo ang sarili mong nanay (o tatay) sa mirror. Super guilt-tripping talaga! Pero honestly, just acknowledging na hindi mo gusto maging ganyan with your kids? That's already half the battle. Maraming mums na nagsabi na the key is seeing it habang nangyayari, tulad ng when you feel that anger bubbling up, take a step back, mag-breathe, or step out ng room for a minute instead of yelling. Kailangan natin i-break ang habit na reflexively react based sa gawaing ginawa sa atin noon. Another thing I've heard works is letting your kids see na ikaw ay hindi perfect, and actually apologizing when you mess up, like "Mommy shouted, and that was wrong, I'm sorry", kasi na-realize nila na parents din ay learning, at hindi lang sila ang dapat mag-adjust. And instead na forcing rules because "ganyan ang ginawa sa akin," try to understand kung bakit gusto mong mag-set ng boundary, tapos explain it sa them in a way na parang partner mo sila, hindi iyong target. It's brave na sinisipen mo ito seriously, therapy or counseling really does help too if you're really struggling with the anger or shame patterns, kasi sometimes we need someone outside to help us untangle our own childhood stuff first. Worth checking in din with your doctor or a family counselor if you feel like the anger's getting out of control, they can give you proper tools tailored to your situation. You've got this!