I've always thought I am able to handle 2 children when my 2nd child arrived 2 months ago. Things is not not gg well especially I feel I have been very harsh with my 5 yrs old boy recently. While I am trying very hard to bond with my LO , the elder one will start to speak very loud at home and will go disturb the baby when he is asleep soundly. Recently, teacher told me the elder one hit someone at childcare and when I ask him nicely , he is totally not willing to talk about it. He does not have this kind of record in school before. When I talk to him , he will just immense himself into his fav TV cartoon and would not answer or pay little attention to my words. Sometimes , he is rude to my mum too. I am starting to worry about his character.... At few times , he pushed me to my limits and I could not tolerate and swear in front of him . I know I shouldn't be and feel ashamed at myself .Things seems to change a lot after the LO arrived . In the past I have read many parenting books in order to be the best mum I could.But I feel like I have failed just been a good mum after all and I feel so angry with him that I told him I don't love him anymore.My husband scolded me for my mean words and I really regretted. At the same time , I really want to give more attention to the little one which he really needs as an infant . I am torn and feel really tired as I also need to spend time with my elder one on his homework as he will be approaching K2 very soon. I need need some wise advices. Thanks

look. im not perfect myself. i handle all 1, 3 and 6yrs old myself.. infact when i scold them. i scold them hard and reason with then. ask them. do you know why u get scolded .this way they understand why we scold them. and when the baby was born... i make sure all activities like changung diaper... take botols... anything.. i make the older kids help out.. like tat they feel wanted and always engage together.... dont feel bad bout what had happened... we all do mistakes... but make sure at the end of the day at night. always tell them i love you. see you tomorrow... kids rrmbr all this little gesture. trust me... i myself is surprise when my 6yr old tell me bout the thing i say to her when she was 3 😂😂

Never swear & say u dun love ur kids. Never! Regardless is out of anger or what. No matter how mad I'm, I never say such. I have 2 kids too. I practice fairness. My elder one is 5 as well and I does know that she is at times jealous & wanna seek attention regardless how fair I m. Becoz she is used to be the only child then someone came in and share her love. It's normal n it's a phase. I involve my gal in taking care of Brother, educate her to love her bro, accept him. To me, being fair is very important. As a Mother, our tolerance level have to be very high. Way to go.. jiayou

Giving you a pat on your back. Hey its not easy, no one said its ever gonna be easy. We have good and bad days. Dont dwell too much. I never like kids till i have 2 of my own. When my 2nd came along i never liked him. Dont ask me why. Lol. Id give the older one some space and give him lots of love. Thats what they need. Kids are not naughty for the sake of it. Normally there is something more then just a outlash of bad behaviour. You can gently correct him. Talk to your older boy and be patient mummy. Jia you!

Bring him out alone with u for some fun activities and have a heart to heart talk to reassure him your love for him? And tell him unlike a baby who can't talk to express themselves, he shouldn't do things that he thought u understand. He should talk it out instead. To demonstrate u will not understand, u point to ceiling, ask him whether he could understand what u want. He may be doing all this to get your love.. But frankly, this is just my suggestion only, not sure whether it's correct and whether it works.

Well, handling kids are never easy no matter it is one, two or three. WE all know it's tough to be really fair but we will have to else it will be very very unfair for #1. To our #1, we have robbed him'her off 50% love when #2 is born. We need to assure him/her that our love for him/her is always there and will never change. Action speaks louder than words. Engaged #1 together with activities that can be done together with #2 especially. Words of comfort and assurance really helps.

i feel you mommy, i have three kids 7yo, 2yo and 8 mos. It takes time to adjust and patient is the key tool for them. I tried to give individual routine and stick to it until they manage to adjust themselves too. Hang on there soon everything will be fine. Our children knows and feel that we love them no matter what. Don't forget to say i love you everyday not just because we need to say it but because we do love our children dearly. Bless your family.

It’s not easy to be a mother in the first place. I just gave birth to my #3. And prior to her arrival I taught my elder twins how to love and sayang meimei. I also tot of spending more time with twins since I couldn’t while I was preggie. To me, alone time with just one is also impt. So maybe you shld bring ur elder son out without newborn. To let him know that mama still loves him and will try to make time for him. Hope it works.

I am a mother of 3. handling more than 1 kid is never easy. try to have some alone bonding with #1. I try to plan a few hours everyday to bond with #1 & #2 . going for lunch just 2 of us is good enough. a trip to the playground, popular bookshop. as much we like to bond with the bb. we must not forget the bond with our older children. so they will not become jealous and hates the youngest. all the best

I understand wat u are feeling ... I have 3 kids age 8,6 n 5 .... when they are younger many time feel like giving up but I survive till now ... n now when come to teaching is even more headache I can't focus on only one child ... sometime like only spelling if they didn't do well I feel so bad seem to be my fault but it OK slowly u will get use to it n will know how to handle ... dun worry k .

It not easy to handle both kids, & your little boy is getting jealous of your lo, your little boy want as much as your attention from you. maybe you can seek help from you mum or husband on the weekends both can go out bonding together. Maybe your can try look for part time helper with your house work & you have more time with your boy.