Choosy sa work si hubby

Question

I really dont know what to do with my husband 😮‍💨Situation: may 2 years old kami and I am 12 weeks pregnant with our second child.We currently live with his parents. Only child lang sya. May work ako, and WFH setup.**September 2022, nag resign sya sa work nya. He earns 40k a month. Reason, career change. He works in a BPO. Ayaw na nya mag BPO at private company na. He wanted to pursue his course (programming). Ayaw sya pakawalan nh company and they offer a higher position, but he declined at pursigido sya sa career change.I told him na, di madali gusto nya kasi, its been a decade na nung grumaduate sya at wala syang experience sa programming. For me, mas pipiliin ng mga employers ang fresh graduate na mababa ang starting. Sabi ko, aral muna ulit sya (refresher) habang nagwowork para may pantustos sya. Tapos, pag may certificate na sya or something na maooffer sa new company, saka sya mag resign. Matigas ang ulo to the point na nag away kami dahil wag ko na daw sya pilitin sa ayaw nya. Hinayaan ko sya. Na-adik din kasi sya sa online games. So, yung panahon na wala syang work, puro online games sya. May savings sya at ayun ang pinang gagastos namin. At may work nga ako. Fast forward, march na. Sinubukan nya mag apply sa desires work nya pero as expected, laging failed or di sya qualified dahil nga wala syang experience.He then, decided na mag aral na nga pero napaka mahal pala ng tuition 😞, at paubos na savings nya so hindi na kayaAt may dumating pa nga na isang blessing sa amin 🤰 .Now, I am trying to help him maghanap ng work.. kahit sa call center ulit pero napaka choosy nya. He wants a high salary, work from home at non voice (hind nagtatawag). Malapit na ako mapuno at gusto ko sabihin sa kanya na WAG NA SYANG MAARTE DAHIL WALA NAMAN PALA SYANG IBUBUGA. NA ASAN NA YUNG YABANG NYA?? Na inaway nya pa ako dati  by giving him an advice pero, ngayon, ano na sya.Pero, wala akong sinasabi sa kanya kasi ayaw ko i down sya. Pero, sa ginagawa nya na napaka choosy sa trabaho, hindi ko na alam.Nasstress na rin ako kasi, need ko tuloy mag ipon pang CS ko dahil CS ako sa first born ko.Tapos, gastos pa sa bahay. Inaasikaso nya naman kami mag ina pero hindi pa rin sya tumigil sa online games nya.Tulad kanina, he had an interview sa isang call center. 1 ride lang from our house, but mukang failed sya kasi nag ask nya ng mas mataas na position (TSR ang opening) pero he ask for a higher position

Maria · Answer

Sis, I feel your frustration talaga, you're pregnant, working, and carrying the weight ng household while he's being picky, that's unfair sa'yo A few of us mums went through something similar with our husbands at the turning point talaga was a real conversation (maybe away from the kids) kung saan hindi about blame but about the reality: he has a family to provide for now, hindi lang siya, so choices have consequences, at ang pag-aral ay kailangan pero hindi habang puro games at walang income. He needs to take any stable work now, build experience, then level up later, pero kailangan earning na habang nag-aral if gusto talaga niya. You can't be the sole breadwinner while 12 weeks preggy, that's not sustainable, mama, and it's okay to set that boundary firmly pero with love.

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