I am wondering why my wife keeps saying that being a stay at home mum is such hard work. I am not trolling here - but i frankly dont understand. Seems simple enough to me. I have taken care of my kids and home all weekend before and it's definitely no where as stressful as having a job. Our kid is 11 months and is formula fed. We live in a 4 rm flat.

ouh wow... where do i even start. so u qoute your son is 11mnths old and bottle fed. it may sound like a simple job. but what bout in between of the days. like woke up early to clean her up. maybe wash her bum 4 to 5 time a day. or even trying to get her dress... maybe feed her solid food is also challenging... and cleaning up after tat is never ending. lemme share with you why its a stressful job. i was a working mom for many many year until i had my third child. my pregnancy wasnt a breeze and i had thoughts of ending my life bcos i cudnt cope with it..... on top of that i was werking with a good company and at a place where i can churn money quick... my colleagues were like family. fast forward.... when i gave birth, my hubs told me to quit all thats ive achieve and gain personally to take care of all 3 kids and be a full time housewife. there it gets worst... why? strip off from my dignity, my freedom, my money, my own time, my personal space, heck even simplest conversation .... i survive 10mnths of trying to get use to the lifestyle.... and lemme tell you... with all the negative thoughts i have i my head, im glad we all survive. easy for you to say... hey i help over the weekends... hahahah.. ask urself. did u gave your wife emotional support. talk to her when u come back home. tell her shes doing very well keeping the house clean (even when its not). praise her for the food she cooks for you.... these things matters to us SAHM. maybe, well just maybe.... u give her a timeout and you do it all by yourself and no one serve u back. how would that feel. she have sacrifice her life to give birth and yet another sacrifice her time and energy for a tiny human being who can actually transform to a monster mind you... ☝🏽 so over the weekends. let her sleep late. wash the loo. clean the whole house. make her pancakes and bring her to the park, carry your kid.. let her at ease. try it. when i was werking i wish i am not. now that i am not i wish i was working. cos the stress level is not the same when u werk with ppl. and we cant bail this job bcos its our responsibility. the dilemma is real. when u r sick. u can apply AL, CCL, OIL, PH yada yada... but when a SAHM is down... nothing is change.

I have just left my 5 days workweek office job to be a full time SAHM knowing it will be a tough and challenging role. How does a SAHM life looks like on daily basis? Just like some of the SAHM who have shared, it's really round the clock without any peace to even go for a toilet break when urgency call for it. My 13 mo baby woke up at 6.30am for her first bottle fed and my day starts from there! Gonna play with her, bathe her, etc and all the way till she take her first nap which is about an hour. So this is my first free time to start preparing her lunch (prepare the ingredients for cooking, doing laundry, etc). So when she's awake, I have to go back to full gear mode to play with her, feed her the cooked lunch, etc till she go for her next nap which is also an hour between 3-5pm. So what do I do now? Prepare ingredients for dinner! Being a SAHM, I will need to cook so as to reduce the cost of living. When my husband is back from work, dinner is served and after dinner is done, I will be back to the kitchen to wash the dishes. After I'm done with the dish washing, it's time to bathe my baby! And guess what? It's already 8.30pm by then when I'm done with all this. And the last thing to do now is to prepare my baby for her sleep. Try doing that for a week without any help from anyone including your wife and you should be able to sense where the stress come from. Baby or toddler will tend to throw some tantrums or refused to sleep at time and the routine stuff still needs to be done which is even more stressful. Your wife also need a channel to relax her mind and share her frustrations.

Put it this way, our sleeps are totally deprive especially when they are still baby , toddler stage . They needs 24hours eyes surveillance on them . Having them to tag along for grocery is real tough , heavy loads to carry and sometimes in between the shopping cranky baby starts tearing the place down . And sometimes just have to put a halt and dash to find a nursing room in case baby wet his diapers or hungry or just attention seeking . Really stress to the max. Lunch time is just probably 10 to 15min cos we have load of washings to do , daily cleaning the floor , toys and cleaning up the mess . Preparing foods for the little ones also need to draft up a menu to make sure nutritional needs are taken well care of for this little buds . Sometimes even to go for toilet break just simply seems to be no peace cos having little crawling intruders trying to crawl in and just disrupt the momentum . With all these SAHM have no salary, no annual leave , no medical leave, no bonus and sometimes no even an appreciation of Thank you . In work , project can be completed but for caring of baby is no ending and job satisfaction is simple to make baby happy and healthy and plus high responsibility. But of cos working men have their stress too. So each of their own have their difficulties, so be happy and appreciate each other . Never compare cos is never the same .

I'm not a SAHM but this is how i see it.. Being a SAHM is like having a job that has no stipulated "start work" or "end work" timing. No annual leave, no sick leave and no bonuses. There is no "break" from being a mother (or wife for that mater). "Family" is the top priority and every decision or thought is usually centred upon the husband, parents (in-laws and relatives included) and children. Things that may seemed trivia, like how much sleep, how much food, and even how much poop is of great concern to the mother. Even when a mother is able to take "time off" for some me-time, some would feel guilty (mummy's guilt) and could not really enjoy the "break". I would say the stress is different and is constant. Not sure if your wife is around during the weekends when you look after your baby.. but I'm hoping that you could better appreciate what your wife is going through. I personally applaud and admire all my mummy friends (be it SAHM or FTWM) as I could see the stress and struggles that they go through on a daily basis. It would definitely help to have an appreciative hubby. Like what Ling has suggested, try being a SAHD for a couple of days (without the help of your wife). If not, have a read at this article: http://www.daddyfishkins.com/apology-stay-at-home-moms/

Hi there. Taking care of your kid and home all weekend is different from being with your child around the clock every single day. Having a child who is formula fed doesn’t make it any less tiring. I hope you don’t actually say this to your wife because honestly its quite mindless. Also i’m sure your wife has to clean the house, do the laundry (wash, dry, fold), cook (do marketing) and also attend to you once you are home as you didn’t mention of having a helper for housechore. All of these, she has to do on top of taking care of the child. I hope all working partners out there will never have this mindset towards their other half who could just as well work but chose to stay at home and take care of the child. So many things that they have to sacrifice, multi task on daily basis with no off days or whatsoever and having this kind of thinking from their partner doesn’t really seems fair/ helpful. Try to empathise with your wife for once and i’m sure you will understand where she is coming from. Seems to me you are just comparing your off day (weekends) and being home with them to her taking care of the child 24/7 all day, all week long.

Err.. I would rather do my job actually than SAHM. My job is stressful with lots of travel, managing deadlines and ppl, but I felt sense of achievement and self satisfaction from the money, status, coworkers and friends, and lifestyles. As SAHM, all of those are stripped off, replaced with daily routine trapped inside walls, cleaning, doing laundry, cooking, prepping food for baby, feeding baby solids few times a day, bathing baby, entertaining and putting baby to sleep. Not to mention when baby is cranky, or changing diaper and cleaning after the mess few times a day. Not having anyone to backup when sick, or simply want to have alone time. In addition to the irony, sometimes lack of appreciation from husband/in laws and constantly being judged/blamed when kids are not in perfect condition. It is not only physically tiring, but also emotionally draining, endurance, patience, everything is being tested. Doing for some weekends definitely is not the same as doing it forever. Try doing it for one week and see if you still think the same. Doing for some weekend is not equal to

I'm sure your wife must be thankful for you being able to take care of your kids home all weekend. Good job daddy! I mean it. :) Being a SAHM with no need to wash clean and cook is not too difficult. However, trying to be a perfect SAHM to children and wife to a loving husband ain't a simple feat. Especially, when it's not a weekend job. A working husband gets day offs and can choose to take leave from his annoying colleagues and ridiculous bosses. SAHM doesn't get days off nor leave from her beautiful active children. At least the working husband gets an hour of peaceful lunch everyday, a SAHM gets peace only when her beloved children knocks out deeply at night. But if her child awakes from nightmares, she gotta soothe the poor child/ children back to sleep. So a quiet lunch or break is virtually non existence. >.< So many more things to add. But one thing for sure. Your beautiful wife is very appreciative of you going to work, being the sole breadwinner for your(our) family. It is not an easy job for you daddy. You are doing great. :)

To each its own. My personal views. A SAHM is a job which is round the clock. We are dealing with our kids, the most important person in our lives. Everything we do, say and act affects the children. Its hard balance out taking care of the emotional, physcial, and mental aspect. Our needs, are needed to be met before being able to do more. Being a SAHM is neither a job either. Having kids just for a weekend is all fun and laughter. Over an extended period of time, it wouldnt be. anymore. Its not something which you can say dont like leave, dont want to do, dont care. It would be a good idea if you exchanged roles with your wife if you really want to experience it firsthand. Perhaps it maybe more suitable for you? Trail and error, to each its own. Our capabilities and strengths are all different. We are different, there is no one else out there like us. :) If you have require more assistance please feel free to post them here. I hope i explained myself. The easiest way is to do it, and youll know. Cheers.

I was both FTWM and SAHM. My experience is the stress are different and both are not easy. FTWM - There is income, I feel that I have more say and more financial freedom. Able to afford basic vacations when needing a "break". Might feel guilty for not spending enough time and observe my child's progress closely. Might indulge in my child like having taxi trips, some toys. SAHM - The very important thing is spouse have to be understanding and supportive otherwise it will be a miserable job. Have to be more thrifty. Have to have firm in not buying toys unnecessarily. More patience need to dealt with my child's school work as I didnt apply for student care. Was able to spend more time as a family especially when hubby's off from work. Able to bring him to places during holiday instead of working all day. Able to hear what he had to say everyday after a long day at school. More tolerant towards spouse too as not as burnt out and rushing for time when working. These are just my individual experience. :)

I do house chores and take care of my LO . She’s 14 months old . It’s tiring if I were to compare it with my job . I need to multi task at work , which will cause me to be drain out mentally but taking care of kids and house chores drain me both mentally and physically . The patience you need to have is unimaginable when it comes to getting things done at home with your LO around . They won’t allow you to do things smoothly and you can’t manage them . But I am allowed to work at my own comfort level when I am working and manage things well . I would strongly suggest you to take up the role of doing house work and taking care of your LO and you’ll understand what I meant and you’ll learn from it . If you were to ask me a honest answer , I would rather be at work than be a SAHM/D .