Hi, I totally understand what you're feeling now. I'm a first time mum and gave birth just 2 months ago. I encountered engorgement during the 2nd week and low supply, it was so bad that I gotta seek help from a lactation consultant to come to my house to help me with the engorgement but it was worth it. After that one session of help from the lactation consultant, I slowly increased my supply through power pump and learnt how to massage my breasts to ease the engorgement. It was really hard during the first few weeks but I promise you it'll get easier and the engorgement does get better once you get the hang of massaging your breasts. I even broke down and cried during the second week when the engorgement happened, throughout my entire pregnancy I didn't even complain or cry, it was the breastfeeding and engorgement that broke me down and made me cry. But just push through and I'm used to the pumping schedule, waking up in the middle of the night to pump (netflix and using that time to watch your favorite drama or play handphone game helps). I take the night time pumping as my me time to watch drama and be away from my baby (baby sleeping with hubby while I pump in peace at night).
I am also looking after the baby on my own with no help, husband at work, I have no helper, I'm all alone with baby at home and 2 dogs (yea I have to also feed the dogs and clean their pee and poo too). My tip is to always feed your baby first before you start pumping, if can, put your baby to sleep first then you pump (so that you can watch drama in peace again...)
Ultimately it's your choice to continue breastfeeding or not, you're the best mum for your baby. All the best!
oh and on the bright side, breastfeeding helps you to lose weight! I went back to my pre-pregnancy weight after confinement and able to fit into my old pair of shorts.
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