Ay anak, hindi ka nag-iisa at hindi ka dapat mag-guilt! A few of us moms went through the same thing, that voice in your head saying "don't eat" even when your body and baby need it, kaya alam ko kung gaano kalaki ang kalaban na yan. But listen, ang gatas mo is literally liquid gold para sa baby mo, at hindi siya magiging mataba kung kumain ka ng healthy, your body knows how to use that fuel para mag-produce ng best milk for him, so please be kind to yourself and eat, mama. Four months in and you're still fighting your own demons while taking care of a tiny human, that's not weakness, that's strength na hindi mo na-recognize. If the stress about eating and your body image is getting heavy talaga, maybe talk to your OB or a counselor kasi deserve mo na mag-heal from this, not just survive it. You're doing amazing, and your baby is lucky to have a mama who cares this much.